nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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