i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
I call biggest shit show at the party. I welcome all challengers.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Yeah, sometimes it takes a while to realize, wow you kind of suck and not in the fun way
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