i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Well you are. Awfully cute even. Like baby bunnies. And tiny, tiny penises. You know.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
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