he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
Girls should come with a carfax report
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
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