I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
