I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Guy having heart attack in McDonalds. Classic.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize