I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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