Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.