she had the hairiest bush ive ever seen. it looked like a spoiled head of lettuce.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️