so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
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he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
23 People Confess The Most F*cked Up Thing Guests Have Done In Their House
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?