I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
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