I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best part of having a window in your office is that you can leave through it when you shit your pants at work.
She almost killed me. The shot she handed me had tacks in it. Wtf?!
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
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