How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
organizing the empties. That sober.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
According to the arrest report, I shouted "no, YOU put some pants on" at the cop. Downhill from there.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
