I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
I may have told her we're dating for a handjob, Fake tits are overrated.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I'm really starting to miss his dick. Like so much I'm actually tempted to try and work things out with him again.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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