Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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