I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I got pissed off that no one would let me spray them with a bottle of champagne at midnight of the new year. so I sprayed myself with one shirtless in the near freezing cold outside
He may be engaged to someone else, but god damn that was the best 3 hours I've ever spent naked with someone.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
His dick has the same name as my pipe. I'm keeping him forever.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize