Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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