i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
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