YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
He kept saying it was because he was allergic to the chicken. Then he threw up on my mom.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
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