We won't sleep together?
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
