and you said cock pushups were impossible
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Life is clearly unfair. You remember Courtney has three older sisters, well they're all "make baby sister look like a four" hot. I knew I shouldn't go home with her.
Randomize
