This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I woke up and he used my makeup to write "hope you don't get pregnant" on my mirror before he left
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
Randomize
