Texts From Last Night

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  (416): View more from Ontario

  dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening

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  (416): dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening http://tfl.nu/ihge
  Replies (12) Good night (7268) Bad night (761)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.

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  (419): Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name. http://tfl.nu/pkap
  Replies (6) Good night (3762) Bad night (702)
• Favorite

  (816): View more from Missouri

  I'm so horny

  (913): View more from Kansas

  I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect

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  (816): I'm so horny (913): I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect http://tfl.nu/ggyh
  Replies (12) Good night (5934) Bad night (1377)
• Favorite

  (973): View more from New Jersey

  Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?

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  (973): Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes? http://tfl.nu/t0sq
  Replies (17) Good night (3571) Bad night (2003)
• Favorite

  (503): View more from Oregon

  you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?

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  (503): you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you? http://tfl.nu/6gws
  Replies (4) Good night (3490) Bad night (832)
• Favorite

  (931): View more from Tennessee

  everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend

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  (931): everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend http://tfl.nu/stvz
  Replies (9) Good night (992) Bad night (4173)
• Favorite

  (+61): View more from Australia

  The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.

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  (+61): The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there. http://tfl.nu/zi0e
  Replies (11) Good night (2132) Bad night (715)
• Favorite

  (250): View more from British Columbia

  Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.

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  (250): Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life. http://tfl.nu/nnhi
  Replies (8) Good night (1059) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (434): View more from Virginia

  High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.

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  (434): High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world. http://tfl.nu/0gxn
  Replies (3) Good night (819) Bad night (513)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?

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  (225): Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me? http://tfl.nu/lu4d
  Replies (13) Good night (1329) Bad night (635)
• Favorite

  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.

  (214): View more from Texas

  I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity

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  (832): I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle. (214): I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity http://tfl.nu/3j7l
  Replies (2) Good night (788) Bad night (410)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.

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  (253): it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting. http://tfl.nu/k4ds
  Replies (2) Good night (700) Bad night (484)
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.

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  (585): Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings. http://tfl.nu/zv1f
  Replies (0) Good night (752) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck

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  (306): woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck http://tfl.nu/v8nv
  Replies (3) Good night (498) Bad night (374)
• Favorite

  (404): View more from Georgia

  How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of

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  (404): How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of http://tfl.nu/yhrq
  Replies (2) Good night (485) Bad night (511)

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