I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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