i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
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