No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Randomize
