So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
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