Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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