I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He actually has his life put together though, during the date we walked by a shoppers drugmart where my friend and I once flashed a janitor and all I could wonder was how does he not see shit show written all over me?
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
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