I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Quick, to the slutcave!
Fuck appropriateness.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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