The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
Oh I forgot to tell you one of the little boys in my preschool class was wearing a Hooters tank top today.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Randomize
