remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
we made out on top of his cat.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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