everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
My dream of liquor pitchers came true
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
Randomize
