My head feels like little people r playing bumper cars inside it
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Just jacked in the family restroom in the hospital while eating beef jerky and looking at reddit gone wild.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize