Im at a strip club, and the dancer just farted into my face. The bad part about that is I could taste the wings I bought her earlier
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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