matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
I just broke up with Liz. I feel awful so I put two free rentals on her Blockbuster account.
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
I think I am morally bankrupt
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
Randomize
