You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
I thought you'd have died of alcohol poisoning years ago! How'd you get my number?
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
Randomize
