YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
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