What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
Randomize
