Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
Randomize
