He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
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