bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
He called me kiddo. We can't have sex
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
Is talking to an iron man poster a good or bad indicator that you've been drinking too much?
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
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