Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Randomize
