The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Where are you guys?
Drunk
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