margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
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