I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be wrong to text my ex and say "congratulations on the new baby that you had with a stripper"?
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize