But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
I'm okay, they said the swelling should go down in a week. But next time I'm shitwrecked, please make sure to remind me that I can't open a champagne bottle with corkscrew.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Just put on slippers before underwear so you know where my priorities are
then you dropped a clam in a draught beer like it was a drop shot and and started chugging as beer spewed all over your body.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
