Why did you send me a picture of a dick?
It was an accident sry. Not mine tho.
were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Every concussion has its silver lining
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Randomize
