I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
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