Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Drake has all the answers
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Randomize
