we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Khloé Kardashian Finally Speaks Out About The Tristan Thompson Cheating Scandal
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
15 Porn Memes You’re Only Allowed To Laugh At If You’re Over 18
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
THERE IS A VERY SMALL CHILD YELLING OUTSIDE OF MY DOOR. THE NEXT TIME YOU TELL ME YOUR TOO BIG FOR A CONDOM I'M GOING TO PUNCH YOU IN THE DICK.
Randomize
